I don’t know about you, but I’ve had the impression (or dream) that once my kids were grown and gone off to college that I would have much more time on my hands. What a fantasy that has turned out to be!
Since my youngest headed off to college 7 months ago, I’ve struggled to get my freelance work, and housework done – don’t even mention having free time for fun activities. We were going out to dinner MORE because I hadn’t gotten dinner together in a timely manner. I tried getting up earlier and earlier and only made myself more tired.
With both kids home, I had no problem juggling homeschooling, freelancing, field trips, running outside organizations, making dinner, spending quality time with hubby, getting everyone to sporting events and everything else. What gives?
Let the change begin
At WordCamp San Diego 2017, I attended a session by Natalie MacLees on “How to make time for a side hustle.” After 20 years of freelancing, I was interested in hearing how to better MAKE some time. Natalie was quick to point out that time cannot be MADE only spent. She went on to give some excellent advice on managing time. For me, the most useful suggestion was TRACKING how I was spending my time for a few weeks.
Using my trusty bullet journal, I tried a few different methods. First I listed what I PLANNED to do on one side of my timeline and then what I actually did. It was crazy as my plans was often changed by clients (or my husband) during the day. Next I tried drawing arrows from my priority list to the time spent. This produced a messy page that I couldn’t easily decipher. Third try is the charm, right? The method that work for me was to write down my priority list and then add each task to my timeline as it was completed.
Find the Pattern
After a few weeks, a pattern began to emerge. I was spending more time taking care of household chores and spending time with my hubby than I had expected. I was also getting distracted from my freelancing work by responding to email and text, changing laundry, or answering questions from hubby. When the children were around, I would have interruptions all day long, but we focused on our homeschool from 9 am until about 1 pm each day. I didn’t do anything else. I completed my freelancing work in the afternoons and some evenings. I knew my best time to work was later in the day. I’m a life-time night owler. Mornings and I have seldom been on good terms.
With my housework, I realized what a significant impact the children had in getting things done around the house. For example, the boys took turns emptying the dishwasher and cleaning up after dinner. They also both did their own laundry. Now I was doing dishes and laundry. Thankfully hubby was helping out with cleaning up after dinner!
Now that’s only a few tasks, but there were many more. Some even more subtle like having to grocery shop by myself instead of with helping hands. Hubby is missing the children when it comes to outdoor maintenance such as mulching the flower beds or mow the yard. I became his only helping hands.
It really surprised me how much of impact to my time doing all the household chores was taking as well as distracting from my freelance work and fun time. Now that I was aware what was consuming my time, I’m better prepared to manage it better.
With your children gone from home, what have you found changed the most with your time?
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